About Me

My photo
Birmingham, Alabama, United States
43 Years old Born in Wilson, North Carolina. Work in Law Enforcement / Patrol, married I am a Political Conservative without a party to represent my vote. I dislike liars, especially the type who are politicians and preachers. I oppose abortion of any type at any stage. The baby is innocent and deserves life regardless of the mothers circumstances. I also dislike racists. Especially the kind that always scream racism at others when life doesn't go there way! Get a life, it's only skin color and God made idiots in all colors. I also dislike Democrats, they wouldn't know the truth if it bit them on the ass. I dislike Republicans, they are truly the most spineless creatures on God's green earth. I dislike arrogant environmentalist who think we can destroy what God created. If your homosexual, I don't dislike you, but please keep it in your own bedroom behind closed doors for the sake of the untwisted.

Saturday, October 29, 2005

Weight Loss Infomercials

Lets be honest, we all have been fooled at least once by these weight loss commercials, ads and infomercials that promise extreme weight loss in 30 days, 60 days or even in just two weeks. All you have to do is pick up the phone, or log onto the net and by next month you will look like you did your junior year in high school. whether it be a pill, a cookie, an exercise contraption that looks like a Nazi torture device, or a jogging suit guaranteed to destroy your self esteem when your neighbors see you jog around the block in what they think is a rescue worker in a Hazmat space suit. Really, take a look at one of the commercials (every fourth commercial, any channel) and see what they are promising. Don't you just love the actual before and after (use of their product) photo's? Like the ever present fat man in a Hawaiian shirt with the sun glasses on? and the picture next to him that looks like Sylvester Stallone. I have always been particularly fond of the gorgeous women who are exercising on the machines in perfect stride and harmony, and yet they maintain a smile that stretches from ear to ear the whole time they are working out. This is supposed to mean, Hey, this is fun! maybe, just maybe if I get one of those machines for only four easy installments of $49.95 I too can have fun and achieve a super model body in only twenty minutes a day, three days a week, in two months. But really the reason they are smiling so brightly is because they are being paid to pose on this machine for just a few camera shot minutes while a group of overweight people admire their body. I mean come on, have you ever seen one drop of sweat on their pretty little faces during these commercials? Why don't they have honest commercials, say like an overweight guy like me with his shirt off, pouring sweat onto his gym shorts and grimacing with agony? I mean really, that's what I do when I ride my exercise bicycle! And the pills, my favorite is this one, "when is a diet pill worth paying over a hundred dollars for, when it works! really works!". Plus it is guaranteed or a full refund less shipping and handling. OK, lets figure this up. I pay $125 bucks for the bottle of pills, plus $12 dollars for shipping and handling. That's $137dollars. OK, I take the pills, lose the weight, everyone is so happy. Or I take the pills and remain the slob that I am. No problem! I mail the empty pill bottle back, if I can find the address. I wait several months and receive a check for $125 bucks. OK, I still lost $12 bucks shipping and handling, they gained at the least $10 off of me. That's if I bother with the refund. And have you seen the one with the Ski type motion? you know the one. You can use this machine and make believe your in Colorado skiing the slopes, and lose weight doing it. I have to admit, I tried one of these at my neighbors house. I know fat people are not known to have great balance anyway, but when I got on this machine, I almost lost a leg to its scissors like motion. I mean it is made of wood and metal after all. I guarantee you Mary Lou Redding would have had trouble staying on that wild ride for more than two minutes in her prime Olympic days. One more thing should throw up a red flag if your bright. Ever noticed the quick little warning on the commercials for diet pills that say, " use of this product alone or in conjunction with any prescribed medication may cause minimum to severe side effects or reaction, including runny nose, heart palpitations, headaches, rash, temporary blindness, hair loss, vomiting, liver failure, or dizziness?" OK guys, this is a red flag! I mean what good is being slender if your walking around holding on to a rolling IV stand?

The useless philosophy of:


No comments:

Post a Comment